Ch-ch-ch-changes

Yes, I know, how original. 

Anyway.

Today at work, my boss offered to buy lunch and produced a Chinese/Japanese menu.  I've been consuming uncommon amounts of sushi lately (and sashimi) because it's...okay food.  Good for me.  Clean.  I got a combo, which was, frankly, precious little food.  I wanted my salad, with the tuna and the barley and the cucumbers and the tomatoes, but I was polite and ate the sushi.  And then I was very hungry when I got home, also tired and not terribly interested in cooking.  So we ordered pizza.  I at least made it somewhat healthy, with tomatoes, spinach, mushrooms, onions and garlic, rather than all manner of meat.  I was worried it would be a trigger.  I like pizza, especially that one, and I was concerned about it being here.

Before it arrived, I ate:  2 leftover barley patties, a small piece of brownie and a piece of toast with butter and lox.  And then I had 3 slices of pizza--pretty moderate slices. 

Reader, I was stuffed.  STUFFED.  Now, at nearly 11, I'm still stuffed.  Also, I feel not quite right, as though I hadn't eaten properly, which I hadn't.

This is a change, a huge one.  I haven't been making a huge effort to eat clean, but my tiny bit of OCD finds it too hard to keep track of what's going on in packaged food, so I don't.  My meals are pretty dull, ingredient-wise.  Lean protein, a bit of a starch (mostly at dinner, and I'm trying harder and harder to make it whole-grain) and a lot of veggies.  Mixed in with the protein, on the side, all over the place, really.  Plus fruit, more than I've ever eaten in my life. 

So the result was that the pizza, which, with those toppings, from that place, is pretty much my favorite, frankly, tasted sort of icky.  I feel sort of icky.  I'll be happy to eat my salad tomorrow.  I'm looking forward to eating my salad tomorrow, believe it or not. 

I'm far from fanatic about eating clean, and I'll be honest and say that a lot of my salads come from McDonald's, and that the occasional Quarterpounder with fries still tastes good, but clearly I'm changing.  This was in just over a month.  It will be interesting to see where I am in two months, in six, in a year. 

The changes in eating have produced changes in me, as well.  I wrote briefly about the clothes.  Yesterday when I got ready for the gym, I noticed that my sport bra felt a little loose.  When I came home I dredged out the gray sports bra, which is the companion to the one I was wearing, the white sports bra.  Gray has always run a little small.  The last time I tried to wear Gray, in fact, I pulled and strained and almost in fact strained something and simply couldn't hook it.  This time Gray fit perfectly.  So I had a little fit of trying on clothes again.  The water-color print pencil skirt can now come off without my unfastening it.  I figure it has two more weeks before it's just silly.  I can wear the tuxedo jacket I just bought, which was too small when it arrived.  My other cream tuxedo jacket is still a bit tight, but not bad.  There are skirts I can wear again, or nearly wear again.  Skirts that can get cycled in when the other one gets cycled out. 

I'm pleased about all this, of course.  I went to sleep thinking about the gray sports bra and making up outfits in my head.  I think, though, that I won't let myself be really pleased till I get my blood work results.  Since the previous rather awful ones were on the heels of a whole lot of uncontrolled eating, I'm hoping that this will bring a rather dramatic improvement.  I really want to stay off meds.  So I'll go on with my salads, and I think I'll avoid pizza from now on.